Transforming yourself into the customer she wants to take home EVERYNIGHT

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The Cold Hard Truth of waitresses and barmaids: The professions and their cousins in the food service and beverage industry like shot girls and cocktail waitresses have a simple plan. They want your money always! These girls live off their tips as they usually but not always make many times less than minimum wage. A good woman in the service industry can make a few hundred bucks in a simple matter of hours. She makes her money stroking a man’s ego, whomever said, “Women are the weaker sex” never dined out, let alone met a stripper. Men suffer from an all to common delusion that a girl has to really like us if she throws a few smiles at us and flirts back. Good God, what if she actually gives you a single free drink? She must be your soul mate and future wife then? I don’t think so! This is a profession that prides itself on service, service that always is friendly and with a smile. This smile is a fake as a wedding cake. These girls are trained actresses, assuming a persona of actually caring about you for a few minutes to an hour. Their skills in acting are not from some high school or college drama class but from constant real life practice working on men for several hours each day.

What happens the vast majority of time? A scenario very similar to this: A guy walks into a bar or restaurant, a hot young woman who knows how to use her sex appeal waits on him. He orders a drink or food and banters back and forth with her for about a minute tops. He keeps ordering food or drinks just to get another few seconds with her to ask “what’s your sign?” Or perhaps “how long have you been working here?” He does this for at least an hour if not longer, all while checking out her ass in that little skirt or pants and seeing if she is wearing a semi-visible thong or looking at her rack and imagining what those sweater puppies would look like topless. She can smell the desperation emitting from your very core and she couldn’t give a shit about you. Eventually he realizes he isn’t going home with her, let alone getting a number. So he reasons that he’ll get her next time. So he decides to save the day by putting out a big tip on the table so that she’ll be forced to remember you. In the end your platter of super sized Buffalo wings and pitcher of some horrible domestic draft winds up costing you fifty dollars. The final result is you just paid a week’s worth of gas for her nice little imported car she is leasing at a sweet 20 years of age. Smiles are exchanged and your welcomed back some other time. After you leave she puts your tiny portion of life savings in her pocket and spots the next rocket scientist who things he can land her and the process repeats over and over till the sun burns out of the sky one last and final time.

What makes these women believe they are “God’s gift to men?” Simple, everyday men who act in the most inane ways to garner their attention stare at them in their place of business. So it is conditioned and reinforced, by these men looking like starved people looking into a bakery window populated by them instead of bread. I mean who really goes to a bar other than too enjoy the scenery and social interaction. The food is usually average at best and overpriced.

Some girl working her way through college or supporting a fatherless kid or two is playing you expertly. I have a few friends who wouldn’t dare ever think of a waitress or barmaid romantically, let alone a stripper. They are too afraid of being played or they think it is next to impossible. But they are wrong, dead wrong. There is a set of rules for chasing them, you just don’t know it or can reason it out through many long hours of observation. Just because you don’t know of these rules, you have already written them off.

Your probably asking yourself right now “how did I come to this area of knowledge?” It started several years back; I was never a drinker really or enjoyed eating at a restaurant at all. I found myself always people watching and had an excellent eye for observing as well as perceiving situations. I witnessed firsthand the losers and winners in this game. I reasoned out what didn’t work and what did and wound up subconsciously applying them and wondering why I was successful with barmaids and waitresses. Before I went back to college, I seemed to have an uncanny intrinsic knowledge of people and manipulation, especially in the form of social psychology. Between rounds I tried to understand what my appeal was. I mean how could a jobless and uneducated guy in his soon to be mid-twenties have almost every one of these types of girls chasing him? It baffled me too. Did I beat God himself in some sort of strange bet and this is my reward? Were the stars aligned perfectly and I could step into my destiny? Was this the first sign of the end of the world? I sat back and to the dismay and jealousy of my friends and associates as I drank and ate for free almost every day. I wasn’t even a people person at that strange time of my life and I practically had to fight them off with a stick. All my experience was from the other side of the table or bar, the same side you’ll find yourself on.

There are a few things that you cannot count on when chasing these types of girls. They have been drilled into your head by countless years of hearing them everywhere. You have been warned. A waitress or barmaid has perfected her “Colgate Smile” to put you into a trance, so you have to really unbrainwash yourself on this one. Flirting is an art form for these girls that has been practiced so many times it truly is second nature to them. Maybe the cashier at your local supermarket flirts with you, but I doubt she expects a tip from you at her work unlike how it is the expected norm at the other place of business. You have to think of waitresses and barmaids as the lite beer version of strippers. As I like to say “less baggage and less maintenance than the regular exotic dancer model.” Once you accept this all will be so much easier for you and your wallet. Meaningless small talk can’t be used as a gauge of interest like you could use on a “normal” girl. Fast and courteous service is just due to her wanting your money in the form of a tip, not your man meat. General helpfulness in the form of relaying the specials or promotions doesn’t mean she wants to bare your children. Performing a bar trick to entertain you is not a viable indicator of interest for you to judge with. In fact I most likely showed her or a coworker one of these tricks your witnessing now or some new ones I have constructed myself. Telling you a joke or two or always listening to your inane jokes is not considered suitable to discover her affection for you either. Lighting your cigarette very quickly is yet another dead-end. So please get over these nine little deadly man traps already. The best way to defuse this person’s persuasion is to take a few seconds and think to yourself. Ask yourself this question: “If the situation was reversed and you were the barmaid/waitress and you did this to a male customer would you expect a bigger tip?” Once you come to the conclusion you know what to throw out and what to keep as a viable indicator of her interest in you.

Chasing a barmaid or waitress is like boxing a really tall opponent in the ring. The boxer has amazing reach and just flicks you away, but this person’s weakness is the inability to defend themselves from a position too close to their body. Hence you need to get inside to score some blows, you want the same thing here with the waitress/barmaid except for them to blow you. The concept is for you to be well known and liked by the wait staff as a whole. Remember while these woman are very skilled players, they still are human and are sexual creatures.

When in pursuit of these women they are some all to common mistakes that guys seem to make. These errors in the game start to really add up and hamstring you in your quest. Some of them seem very minor while others are almost certainly deal breakers when discovered.

The bottom line of chasing a barmaid or waitress is making prgress. As long as she can play you and suck the money right out of your wallet, you won't make any headway sexually with her. Once you quit being an idiot by following these steps, she will see you as more of a challenge.

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Bad Timing

Bad Timing is when you arrive at her heaviest time of work. If the apple of your eye is busy she certainly won’t have time for you. Your service will suffer and you’ll just add right to her work frustration and that is something you don’t want to do. Instead look for the slow times to go and see her. These slow times are usually after lunch and between dinner and the lull after the dinner crowd exits. Generally it is an excellent idea to stay away from her at the very end of her shift after last call. She is too busy and angry trying to throw the drunkards and partiers out and get to bed then put up with you.

Sometimes, when a waitress gets to know someone, and it's not very busy, she'll sit right down with you and talk. If she enjoys your company that much, just look for the signs of attraction, pick your moment, and let it fly. If you get shot down, I'd act like it didn't faze me much, remain friendly, and keep going to the restaurant as if nothing was different that is assuming you like eating there. Seeing that you didn't care that much, she may eventually reconsider. Depends on if you think she's worth the bother.

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Overstaying your welcome

Overstaying your welcome. It is nice to become a semi-regular customer it is important to show that you have a life and are benevolent in nature. So this means no more than a couple of visits a week to the drinking establishment. Remember these girls usually don’t work a five-day workweek. This is particularly true for the college student type of waitress or barmaid. Usually only three or four days tops are they working. Showing up everyday for her shift is not the thing you want to do. This is very true in the beginning. So you’re already maxing out and overstaying your welcome. The idea is to casually run into her. The fewer the days you are out there pursuing her the better. Memorizing her schedule or knowing what she drives so you can find her and see her all the time is stalker territory. You may have good intentions, but getting in to this perceived stalker territory will only hurt you and get you pegged as a weirdo and creep. Once you get perceived as this it is near impossible to remove yourself from this label by her.

When you come in, don't ask specifically for her to be your waitress. Ask occasionally, but she may be too busy to help you every time. If she is really starting to like you, you'll know it, because she'll make sure you always get seated in her section. Remember the stalker rule. These women are some of the hardest women to date ever imagined. They get hit on till the sun burns out of the sky.

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High Matienence Customer

Making her job harder does not help. Being a slave-driving tyrant every time she walks by will irk the living shit out of her. So when you get a refill of your brew, don’t wait for her to come back and have her do something extra for you, like that slice of Key Lime Pie you want with your smoke. Think of everything at once, so she only has to make one trip. If you're friendly and low-maintenance, during slow time, and it's not towards the end of her shift, she will enjoy doing a little extra for you. Especially if she thinks you're cute and doable. But sometimes, don't be demanding at all.

Don't ask how much stuff costs. You just seem like a cheapskate, and it's right there in the friggin menu anyway, so open your eyes Copernicus! Don't ask for stuff to be made special. That's why we have a menu. So don't do that to a waitress you're trying to get with. If she says, "I'm sorry, I don't think the cook will make it that way," you've pissed her off. This place isn’t Burger King with edible shit made the way you like it all the time. If you ask her to check with the cook, now you've really irking the shit out of her. You’re wasting her time, effort, and energy completely. Girls like this are on their feet constantly and don’t want to do anything extra to wear out their arches or shoe leather. And know what you want when she gets to your table. Don't take forever to order. She's got other customers, which translates to even less time with you.

Don't throw her out of sequence. Waitresses like a similar species known only as barmaids are creatures of routine. They have developed an assembly line mentality to get through work as fast as possible. If she asks you what you want to drink as soon as you sit down, there's a reason for that. Waitresses have a routine, and if you say you want the drink with the meal, or you're not ready to decide that yet, she'll say okay, no problem. She's lying right through those perfect teeth that you want to brush tonight with something other than a toothbrush. It's a problem. It is a very big problem actually. Then, when you get your food and she still forgot to bring your drink, don't complain. You're the one who threw her off her routine. You obviously were not being a cool little Fonzie now were you? How are you going to Fonzie her in the Fart Box later if you’re a dick now.

What to order. I know your like now this guy is telling me what to eat and what not to. WTF is up with that? You should order the same thing as much as possible. This serves two purposes: It will help the barmaid and staff remember you, and it will make it easier to wait on you. They will like this. Believe it or not, you are a more desirable customer if you do not shift gears every time you come in. She'll already be pouring your drink when you'll say "No, I think I'll have something quite fancy tonight", like your French Royalty or something.They hate this, it makes them have to think and work harder - things that you don't want them to associate with you.

Don't drink shots, unless you are with a bunch of friends who are celebrating or toasting something, and then only one. Shots cause you to end up out of control, and that is the last think you want. Sometimes order food and sometimes don't. Unlike drinks, do not order the same thing every time. You want to appear as if you like variety and you have a refined palate. Order the same thing a lot, but not all the time. She'll feel a closeness to you if she can smile and say, "Let me guess-- coffee, black...T-bone steak, medium rare, fries and corn, right?" She's getting to know you. But don't be too predictable. Keep her guessing by ordering something different occasionally.


Keep this kind of bullshit up, and all the waitresses will avoid you. They'll say, "Here he comes douche bag again. I took him last time; today it's your turn. Please Nicole, you take this asshole’s table, and I'll switch days for you so you can see that concert.” Please don't be that guy. Make them fight over whose turn it is to serve you, not avoid you like you have SARS.

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Leaving the tip Part 1.

Tips is an acronym for “to insure prompt service”. The dictionary defines it as: Optional payment given in addition to a required payment, usually to express appreciation for excellent service. It is also known as a gratuity.

You don't want her to like you because you're a good tipper. Instead you want her to like you because you're a fair tipper. Give her what she's earned. But please don’t ever be mean. If she's a little ditzy and screws up a lot, but you can tell she's trying, cut her some slack. She'll really remember and love you for it. For you cheap ass bastards, you may not like it, but if you leave less than three dollars, she's going to think you're a Goddamn cheap ass piece of shit. Your probably asking yourself right now as you read this:"Well, what if I just ordered coffee?" Don't. Order some damn food. You want coffee go to Starbucks and overpay for it there. Pay some outrageous amount for a Triple Mochalottalattemotherfucker. If you're just a java guy, she's not going to like you, because she'll know you're going to be leaving a puny tip. And pay in dollar bills. Don't leave her your loose change, some lint, and a crumpled Juicy Fruit wrapper or better yet a 25cent stamp you seem to mysteriously found in your pocket. . Do not irk the woman who brings you food. Especially if you’re a dumbass like me and cannot cook at all.

Please break the delusion that you are harboring in your mind that if you over tip the barmaid she’ll pull off her clothes and part her meat-curtains just for you! All guys tip her well and that is how she makes a living. Do you honestly think that you can buy your way in? Save yourself the money and frustration, get an escort and dress her up like a waitress or barmaid and live out your sick fantasy. Just be sure to show some pictures to me. OK? There is no relationship between your tips and her interest. Any actor or sports star can walk into her place of business and leave half a dollar or a whopping whole buck and she’ll sure as shit go out with him and even bed him down. Some guy tipped my girl $98 for 3 beers on New Year’s Eve years back. Did she take him home? NO!

In the event you have drug one or more of your friends out to drink or eat with you, a special condition exists. If one of your friends is not tipping, prompt him in a classy way. Do not be obnoxious about it. Do not say, "Tip her. Look at her, she's a hot ass bitch and will be the mother of my children!” Say, "Dude, have some respect, these folks work hard and show them some common courteousy please”.

Tip as you normally would for good service. DO NOT OVERTIP! This cannot be expressed strongly enough. As I said, overtipping makes you appear overeager and as if you are trying to impress. If the girl is meeting you behind the bar after her shift next to the dumpster and giving you a hot wet deepthroating blow job to rival Briana Banks herself than feel free to be overly generous with your money. In fact find me and email me and tell me about this girl and where she works and I’ll throw some dough your way.

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Leaving the tip Part 2

Tipping is very important. But knowing what to tip does many things. First if you over tip you look bad and desperate in her eyes. Plus your thinning out your wallet for nothing. Second if you under tip you look like a cheap ass bastard. I am repeating myself for a reason. So many guys blow this part of the deal. The important thing to remember is that waitresses and barmaids get different amounts in tips for the different work they do. Special situations exist in each profession.

A waitress brings you your food and maybe some drinks. The old formerly accepted minimum was 15%. I usually tip in the percentages of 20 to 25%. There is a current push for 20% on average now. She only gets tipped once when you’re done eating and the bill comes. A cocktail waitress usually brings you a drink out on the floor and you don’t see her as she jumps back into the other part of the club or another spot in the casino. So you can tip them right there. I actually use the barmaid tipping scheme for them when you walk up to a crowded bar with no place to sit to get a drink. This will be mentioned later in the barmaid part. If you’re running a tab pay at the end usually unless the shifts are going to change fast. The outgoing waitress will be patient usually but don’t try and test it.

Bartenders are slightly different. Tip $1.00 per drink either at the end if you’re sitting down or right then for the walk up no seat times. If you’re running a tab again it is usually best to tip at the cash out. You don’t have to tip for the drink that you have sent over to another person. I sometimes throw in half the usual amount when I feel generous. Shot girls are very similar in the way to be tipped. If they are in house shot girls for the club you work at tip them like a barmaid. If they are roving promotion girls going from bar to bar you have more leeway as a rule of thumb. The beer and liquor distributor sends out special promotion girls most often. They get paid by the hour usually upwards of $25.00 an hour. The nomadic shot girls will not be seen by you anytime soon most often. But if you do tip them better you might run into them sometime at another club. They are usually the prettiest and youngest girls around. If you get excellent service you can go up a wee bit in the tip but don’t start going crazy. This isn’t a strip club.

Tipping well also helps in getting the barmaids attention for another round quickly. She’ll remember and want your money again. Reliable tipping is also good to help a new girl or set of girls who have just strolled into your watering hole. It is a good icebreaker and a kind act may be enough social proof to get their attention on you. So this knowledge pays off with the servers as well as the hot customers you may encounter.

[twatteaser]

Failing to understand the learning curve on this project.

These tips like anything else take time to master. You need to try them out in person and see exactly what is your own Strengths and Weaknesses. A prehistoric cliche drilled into our heads since grade school gym and sports is "practice makes perfect". While I do agree in applied repetition of these guidelines will get you somewhere, I don't believe one reading of this will get you a barmaid or a waitress on the first try. Most of this is time consuming to some, but I look at it as an investment of time. Just like putting money in the bank or a Certificate of Deposit (CD) you'll be rewarded with interest on your principal after time.

I like to think that the ideas expressed within this thread will give you insight into an area that was once very hard and thought of as possible only with sheer luck. Like being a pro gambler, you'll learn new ways of approaching situations and give yourself an edge over or at least equalize a situation to give you as fair a shot as possible.

Feel free to pop into a bar and have a drink or two or stop off for a meal maybe once a week. The key part is your observation and perception and how to apply it. Reward yourself with a night out after payday for a brew or two or even hang with the boys once in a while. You could even try bar hopping. I myself love doing this between my class days and days off. The most important part is too watch how other people interact with the barmaids or waitresses. Nothing like watching a train wreck in progress, I know you'll cringe but not look away and get a good chuckle with whatever your having. The learning curve involves yourself as well as the staff and customers of where ever your haunting that moment.

[twatteaser]

A Few choice words can sum up what I want to say to you. This section applies to how you display yourself to others in a drinking environment. The great American icon of film and world’s most underrated director, Clint Eastwood, said it best in his role as Dirty Harry, “A man has to gotta know his limitations.”

You’re in a bar, so what is the first thing you do to pass the time. You are going to drink naturally. Maybe you grab some grub along with it, but we know your going to be boozing to some degree. Know ahead of time what your limit is. If you can’t tolerate hard liquor and by the second shot you have your pants down around your ankles and your clinging to a girl’s leg that works at Hooters it really isn’t going to endear you to her no matter how many times you offer to marry her in your slurred speech. Maybe Molson Ice makes you black out and start a one-man crime spree, that’s not really what you want to be getting that night. I myself have a hard time with champagne, nothing like running into a just cleaned bathroom and throwing up on the floor and being forced to wipe it up with toilet paper cause the janitor forgot to put a new round of paper towels in the dispenser.

I used to drink often in my younger years. I had a stomach that could take quite a mixing of everything. As a barmaid said at that time, “I have worked in over three dozen bars in nearly ten years, and NEVER have a seen a person able to mix beer, hard liquor, and mixed drinks to your level!” Lucky for me that when I did get buzzed that I was always responsible and never got loud. Infact, I was so afraid of being loud and obnoxious that I became like a conspirator and talked very softly and relaxed. The liability that a server has with giving you liquor is enormous, she doesn’t want to baby-sit you or worry that you’ll get into a wreck and sue her and her employer too. So don’t make her think you can’t hang. Know what your limit is ahead of time and stick to it. Personally I grab something to eat before going out usually and frequently get glasses of water in-between drinks.

If you do decide to bring a buddy along, make sure of a few things. Know what his ability with liquor is. If he drinks and gets crazy, don’t go out with him. A lot of guys will cock-block you when they are buzzed. Bringing up stupid shit and trying to see you shot down in flames cause they could NEVER get anywhere with these girls. I had a buddy who would drag along his pet project with him, this associate of his was a short little fat troll packaged to look like a human being. Plenty of times I had a barmaid offer me a backrub only for him to scream” Hey, where’s mine?” I had another girl say, “let’s go out.” Only for Satan’s Oompa Lumpa to say, “yeah, where are we all going?” To say that destroyed the moment is an understatement in the extreme.

In summary know what you can drink and what you can’t. Know how you behave in the presence of a lot of liquor and what your limitations are. Don’t forget to know the above for anyone you drag out with you too. You don’t want to be guilty by association.

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Simply put, people respond better when called their name. If she is a waitress, she more than likely has a name tag. Read it and learn it, then say it when asking for something. If not ask her what her name is. Is that too hard to do? Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) uses a persons name as an introduction to a command or suggestion. People like to hear their names called but please do not overuse it. It can get annoying. “Nicole, may I please have another round of drinks for my friends?” Don’t forget to have manners and say “thank you, Nicole”. Good manners does set you aside from the rude and drunk scumbags she encounters everyday. But this isn’t some posh British Charm School your going to, so keep it simple. Try not to be lazy and immediately enchant her with words like honey, sweetie, babe, fox, or hey. This shit really gets old with her and she’ll just chalk you up as another chump trying to seduce her or a player. Neither of which you want to get labeled as. Learn her name and use it, but not too much.

Keep an aura of mystery about you. Women are naturally curious creatures. They are intrigued by what is mysterious. You want her to come up to you and ask for it. So never volunteer your name. Instead give it when only asked for. She’ll want to get the name of that tall, dark-haired, and witty stranger stuck sitting behind the beer stein. Your words will carry more potency with this veil of mystery around them being the intriguing yet nameless customer.

[twatteaser]

Make yourself stand out. Post #40

Look at it this way. One hot girl in a room full of men stands out. One hot girl in a room full of hot girls doesn't. Sure, you're a decent-looking guy, but she sees a hundred of those every day.

Try and be as neat as you can about yourself in a situation. I am not saying dress like a male model and groom yourself better than a Hollywood star. Just try and use common sense. Don’t come in from cleaning a stable and have the smell of horse piss upon you and think a server is going to enjoy your new designer cologne their buddy. Don’t think you have to go and get a manicure and a facial before going out. Just don’t reek of bleach from cleaning the outside of your house and expect a nice conversation.

This section here is really up to the individual reader and his choice. Some people only look good nicely dressed up; others can wear jeans and a t-shirt and get the girls jumping all over them. It truly is how you perceive yourself and what areas you think your weak in. I actually alternate in what she’ll see me in. Dressed like I was out clubbing to something so plain and ordinary, I vary it.

There is a social psychological phenomenon called the “halo effect”. This halo effect is how we perceive a person of greater than average looks to have certain other characteristics such as being more honest or more intelligent than an average to worse looking person. You see it every day in advertising. Why do you think the Bud Girls look hot? So the reason I brought up trying to look good is due to this. There is a method to my madness always. Try and exploit this as much as you can. You see how a simple make over can make anyone look better and more attractive to the opposite sex. Remember a first impression is made in the first ten seconds of her meeting you.

[twatteaser]

This post is on how to understand and implement detachment in your everyday quest to land that hot barmaid.

Detachment is the act of forgoing emotional involvement. Women do it all the time. They are masters of it and that is the reason why they fascinate us. Well it is time that we return this power back to them to sample. You need to flip the side of the coin that they have been using as the currency of their realm and make it your own.

By showing detachment to this waitress or barmaid your interested in you show that you have other things going on in your life and are not to needy or clingy. Detachment is a good thing due to its potency and economy of use. This little magic trick also acts as a barrier of you overstaying your welcome. Detachment is like stopping while you’re ahead when winning at a card table in Las Vegas. Sure you feel lucky, but are you going blow all your winnings on a chance, instead of just walking away and enjoying that money?

First you must understand how flirting works. Know them and become them. Now you go and ignite the little spark of interest through flirtatious behavior. Everything is going pretty damn good now isn’t it? Well you want to do the thing that is most likely the complete opposite of what you THINK should happen next. You want to walk away. Yes, I said walk away. No really, you do want to do that. I swear, I am not bullshitting you.

What does this do? Well, it infects the girl with an interest in you like a case of venereal disease that you got off the pay toilet in that strip club. Ah, the stories right there alone. You wind up with her wanting more of you. It is the last think she expects you to do. The sudden act of detachment leaves her thinking about you more and more, and when the time is right, when you feel that she is literally hoping more than anything to be with you.

How do I implement detachment in the conversation with the waitress? Simple, just when everything is going really well, make an excuse and leave. Tell her you have an economics exam to study for college first thing tomorrow. This also reinforces the fact that you have a life outside of this bar and her too.

Feel free to practice this technique with any women you encounter. If your too broke to go to the bar right now. Use what you got. Practice it up. See how much interest you generate trying this out. Remember one of the best cards in your deck will be detachment. Don't be suprised if you labeled as the office or class tease after doing this .

One of my best personal stories of detatcment was a barmaid who was very infatuated with me later on. I used these techniques to intrique her. After I left for the bathroom, she asked my friend and wingman why I wouldn't give her any attention. She actually broke down and cried. The next week I saw her the free drinks and invitations to an after hours place flowed like the River Ganges, once I played interested again.

[twatteaser]

This is a route that I never took for a number of reasons but may be a way for you to work it. This is a great way to accomplish the internal networking you must do as well as get some cash for your pocket too.
You can get a job actually working in a restaurant, bar, or club. I never chose this way for the simple reason is hard work is two four letter words that I don’t like to do. I eventually found my way to college and couldn’t afford the time needed to have a job like this. My schedule was too all over the place for it and I took an overload of classes each semester.

If you are in college, get a job serving or tending bar for extra cash. If you have another job and are a workaholic, get a few bar shifts a week somewhere. It is an ideal way to make extra money and expand your social network at the same time. These are two things that you should be doing ANYWAY. You could be a barback, a bartender, a waiter, a cook, or even a bouncer. There are many occupations to work a true undercover campaign from. Bouncers usually have the easiest job. But they are paid shit in cash and $10 bucks an hour don’t fix my broken jaw or nose from a fight. Bouncers do exceptionally well at strip clubs with the dancers and too a lesser degree the barmaids. But not a job I want.

I have known people who were given access to very high paid barmaids. Better than I ever got (yet)! My associate at age 19 worked in a Philadelphia after hours club as a doorman/bouncer. He netted himself a barmaid who made $1300 a night and traveled the world willing to spoil him. She lived in a $2500 a month luxury apartment with some annoying French name to give it that class. So this girl spent a few months across the year going to Paris and Ibiza for fun with her money that used to belong to someone else.

For god sake, DON'T ask out every girl in joint after two weeks. Just play it cool, have a life outside of the girls there, and see who likes you. If you are a constantly evolving, someone will catch your eye or vice-versa.

Improve your social circle to the extreme. Get together with your coworkers and go out. Let your coworkers become your friends. Find out where all restaurant people go to unwind after work, be it another restaurant, bar, or after-hours club.

[twatteaser]

A tight-knit family like atmosphere holds the service industry together. This applies whether it is a corner bar and grill, a restaurant or even a nightclub. The subculture of the restaurant/bar industry is like a big family. They work together, flirt together, chat together, and go out after the shift together. It is a very tight-knit social circle, not easily broken by those who can't relate. Not easily broken by the guy that just walked into the bar with a nice set of clothes on and possessing deep pockets, either. No matter how good of you think you really are, the tools are only so effective across that barrier of wooden bar top that may as well be a bank vault. The most effective way, as Jim Morrison of the Doors put it, is to be a back door man. They almost always agree to date guys that they know and trust, guys who are not losers or nutcases. They date those that they view in their mind as insiders, not strangers.

The post above this is about working with them is one of the best ways to easily become an insider in that bar or club. But it is not for everyone. I doubt you want to give up your IT job to become a cook at Hooters. Though we all know that the cook’s coworkers are really hot looking compared to that girl you fawn over in accounting at your other job.

Some important factors to consider are her coworkers. This is way too often overlooked. Respect her coworkers; treat as well as tip them well. They all talk in the back and, if your name comes up, you want favorable input. Even if you find a girl that is aloof or distant from this family atmosphere it still applies. Women always find some way to talk to each other, unlike guys. Do not be dumb enough to try and work more than one girl in any single bar or restaurant. Most guys take a “kid in a candy store” attitude to the girls and want to sample them all. This has never been more true than it is with the locker room talk at Hooters. It is advisable to not ask an employee personal questions about your target before you are a regular at the least and preferably an insider.

The Barmaid sits atop the social hierarchy of the restaurant or bar. She is often hired because of her looks and assertiveness. The majority of men that she deals with, both customers and coworkers pander to her. Many of the barmaids that you will encounter are friends of the owner or manager, and they enjoy the full support of the organization. The have no problem saying "no" to anyone; they are backed up by the managers/bouncers/other bar staff. So your indiscretions easily get back to her from her underlings or from above from the bar gossip from her boss that is overheard.

[twatteaser]

Okay, so you have read and reread what I wrote before this. But I know you have been asking yourself, “How can I tell when she actually likes me?” Well here are a few indicators of her interest in you. They are more reliable than what we would decode as interest from a women not working in the food service industry. Remember these girls are paid to flirt and act attentive, so a simple smile is not a good gauge of where you’re at as mentioned many posts back.

It starts simple, really simple. She remembers what you regularly drink. You walk into the bar and she looks over at you and asks, “the usual tonight?”

She begins handing free drinks out on occasion. Well-known and familiar people get drinks for free on occasion. Some bars actually allow the bar maid to give out a specified number of free drinks per shift. Other owners are tight assed and greedy. Pay special attention to the frequency of the free drinks, the more frequent the better. I myself seem to always find myself drinking almost completely for free very often. Only when the manager is around does the girl charge me for a drink. Another thing to consider is if she buys you a drink out of her own tip jar. I have had this happen at a strip club by one barmaid/champagne girl in the city.

Don’t be surprised if you actually start out receiving food or drink that was ordered by accident. This is a possible beginning to the road of free booze and food. Remember free is your friend; free alcohol is your BEST FRIEND.


You find her gravitating towards your location when she is not busy. She decides not to read that issue of Cosmo that she brought with her for those dull moments and begins to find you entertaining. I always suffer from this sign way early in the game. Sometimes it would get so bad, I would have to tell her to take care of her customers first and worry about me later. Be especially happy if she really leans in when talking to you, this is an excellent sign of interest in you. She may also ask unprompted personal questions or comments on past discussions that you have had with her.

During piss breaks for you, she may decide to interrogate your friends. She’ll surely ask questions about you when your gone. Things that may pop up are if you have a girlfriend or wife. This is always a good sign. Make sure your drinking buddies are not a bunch of God Damn Cockblockers, or trouble is already there for when she asks.

She comes down to tell you funny stories about other customers or the people that she works with. This is to make you both laugh. Remember the bar is a strange family unit so when she brings this up to you, your on the inside with her, which is right where you want to be.

Be happy when the barmaid or waitress makes you aware of when her shifts are. She’ll usually tell you in a subtle way. You never want to ask for this information yourself; you instead want her to tell you. By asking for it yourself you can find yourself in an uncomfortable perceived stalker territory.

Don’t be surprised if she tells you where her and her coworkers are going out afterwards. Most service industry people party after work like normal people but attend bars and clubs that are open very late. Be especially happy if she actually invites you to tag along.

[twatteaser]

Okay, okay. You finally got her number now what do you do? Well there is a somewhat flexible protocol to follow. Here it is for your enjoyment.

Once you get your dirty little paws on her number, she will AUTOMTICALLY assume the next time you are there is to see her. You have indicated your level of interest with her already. So REMEMBER this!

Remember detatchment, so let some time pass before you ring her. You have to show and keep up the apperence that you have a life outside of the bar. As a rule of thumb wait at least 36 to 48 hours to call. Times may vary more depending on latitude, longitude, and relative humidity.That means a hiatus from your favorite drinking or eating establishment for a wee bit. Don't just show up on her shift the next time without calling here. You could get branded a stalker which is all but impossible to shake off.

Once you decide to go out do something fun. This is called a date, in case you have forgotten. Think of an action related date. Don't screw it up and drag her to another bar or even worse the one she actually works at.

[twatteaser]

Any questions so far? Comments, criticism, hate mail, etc....?

[twatteaser]

Improving your Confidence - Practical exercises.

Situation: the bar is very vacant, you are sitting on your stool taking up space while drinking your sudsy elixir. The barmaid is bored and starts to wash the bar-top, getting closer with each second. She picks up your ashtray and empties it out. She turns back to you and smiles. Here is your golden opportunity, but what to talk about. You know this is especially hard as you always never where to start let alone say to keep a conversation going.

What do you do? Smile back and continue drinking, knowing you just screwed yourself. Or ramble on like the social retard that you know you are? Last option, start using these little techniques to improve your game. What is your choice?

Sparking up a conversation can be seriously tricky. Especially if you find yourself sitting next to somebody who on first glance seems to have absolutely nothing in common with you.

With no obvious common ground to fall back on, it can be tough to break the ice and keep conversation going with a complete stranger. I know that there are techniques that we can learn to help us in such dilemmas.

How do I do it?
Stage 1 - FORE

There are four topics of conversation that everybody can contribute to. These are:

Family- Everyone was born to someone. Do you have brothers and sisters? Do you have a twin? You look so familiar. Are you originally from my area? I think I heard of your family before? What do they do?

Occupation-She obviously has a job as a barmaid, dumb-ass. Is it rewarding, a stepping stone for her real career? Is she a workaholic? Does she like to work around people? How long has she been doing this? Did she go to the bar-tending school? Or did she work her way up as a waitress? What sucks about this job? What is the best part? What did you give up to work night?

Recreation-Girls that work in bars know more about sports than you would think. They pick up shit really quick. Does she think the Eagles will go all the way this year? Should Pete Rose be in the hall of fame? Ever think about skydiving? What concerts have you seen this summer?

Education-Barmaids usually work nights so they can go to school during the day. What is your major? You want to be a female sports broadcaster? You had Professor Long too? Was his public speaking class hard as you initially thought from the first day?

The great thing about these topics is that they are pretty much universal. Most people have had or have a family. The same goes for a job. Most people like doing things in their spare time - even if it is watching television. And of course, we all had to go to school at some point in our lives. So everyone we meet will be able talk about at least one of these subjects.

What is so useful about having these topics up your sleeve is that it actually allows you to not have to do too much. If you do not want to talk then you can sit back and listen to what is being said. On the other hand you may be interested in what the other person has to say and join in enthusiastically - the options are there.

Stage 2 - Open Ended Questions

It is a common misconception that good conversationalists always have amazing stories to tell and a well of jokes to dip into. In fact, what most people want from conversation is dialogue and interaction, not just one way traffic.

A good way of creating this flow of dialogue is by asking questions in a specific way. For example, questions like 'Do you live in Philadelphia?' can be answered with a 'yes' or 'no': not very good for breeding conversation. Whereas 'Where do you live?' has scope for a longer, and hopefully more interesting reply. This is an open ended question.

As a general rule:

Questions starting with 'are' or 'do' are closed questions, generating yes or no answers.


Questions starting with 'what', 'where', 'which', 'who' and 'when', are open questions, which need fuller answers.

If you are looking for something a little deeper and more involved then you could try out the probing questions. These start with words like 'how', 'why' and 'in what way'.

[twatteaser]

Bar tricks for the extrovert Post

Expect the barmaid to know some of these but not all. Some are redundant but what the hell. they are gold with a novice hot barmaid.


A bakers’ dozen of bar trick links for you.

http://bartendermagic.com/BarTricksMain.html

http://www.absolutelycollegiate.com/bartricks.asp

http://www.malepig.com/bar_tricks.php

http://cyber-party.tripod.com/Magic/BARTRICKS.html

http://www****ready2party.com/bar_tricks.htm

http://www.cocktail-recipes.co.uk/m...D-17/Tricks.htm

http://www.cocktail-recipes.co.uk/m.../Easy-Flare.htm Technically showman shit not really a bar trick but a bar tender’s art

http://www.bartricks.com/index.shtml
Ha! There are others of my kind.

http://www.wannalearn.com/Just_for_Fun/Bar_Tricks/

http://www.drunkoncampus.com/bartricks.html

http://gcgordy.crosswinds.net/barmagic1.html

http://www.magicroom.co.uk/tricks1.htm

http://www.mastersschool.com/tricks.html

http://www.thevirtualbar.com/Entert...yBarTricks.html

[twatteaser]

The art of Joke telling simplified. Learn it and use it. Pick your own jokes.

How to tell a joke like a professional comedian
If you talk to any professional stand-up comedian, they will all tell you that telling a joke in a way that will guarantee a laugh is terribly hard to do. Indeed, professional comics refer to the story-telling element of their jobs as 'selling' the joke. For most jokes to succeed, they must overcome an audience's natural biases and sensibilities and come up with a satisfying 'twist' punchline that is so unexpected that the audience can't help but react. If you want to share a joke around the watercooler just like a professional comedian would tell it, here are a few pointers:


1. Size up your intended audience and occasion first before launching into any joke. Stand-up comics may look like they're naturally flowing one joke after another, but the good ones are editing themselves as they go. You should do the same at home. That joke you're about to tell may work at the gym, but could be highly offensive in front of the ladies' auxiliary. A great joke depends on the right audience, so think long and hard about the appropriateness of your joke with that particular audience.


2. A good joke starts with a good setup. Resist the temptation to rush through the opening of a joke so you can get to the 'good part'. Part of what sells the joke is having a good mental image of the characters involved. If they're stock characters that should be familiar to everyone hearing the joke, then you can move a little faster. "Superman and Aquaman walk into a bar, and Superman says..." would not need a real elaborate setup, but "A farmer comes to the big city, and he sees this pigeon..." might need a bit more setup. What kind of farmer is he? Is he one of those wise old farmers who likes pulling one over on city people, or is he more of a fish out of water in the big city? The setup is important, because the rest of the joke hinges on our knowledge of how these people SHOULD act.


3.Once you've established the setup, use your best storytelling skills. Rarely will you hear a professional comedian tell a traditional 'joke' from start to finish. They might start out with a premise- this old farmer goes to the big city- but embellish the story to cement this character in the audience's mind. If you have the time, you may want to do this yourself. Tell a side story about how this same farmer did something else that ties in with the main joke. Really punch up the element that will pay off in the end. "Now you have to know, this old farmer was really stubborn. I mean, stubborn as a mule." His stubbornness leads to the punchline, so take the time to emphasize it at every turn of your story.


4. The punchline is the high point of your joke, so build towards it with timing. Comic timing can make or break a joke. Allow for laughs throughout the joke by pausing long enough for most of the audience to get your reference, but continue with the setup and story before the laughs completely die down. If the story involves two characters having a comical conversation, take a moment to show a physical reaction by one of the characters. Professionals call these pauses 'beats', and they are crucial to comic timing. Beats allow an audience to keep up with the joke as it progresses, and allows the comic to show facial reactions of the characters or slow down the action. Waiting a beat before continuing is especially effective if the comic is part of the joke, as if the situation involved him personally.

5. The punchline may be the end of the joke, but not the end of the performance. If you've done your job well, the punchline will sell the joke to the audience by itself and you'll receive the laughs you were aiming for. But a professional comic knows that the punchline itself is only part of the ending. Once you've delivered that one line that should break the audience up, keep your own reactions to a minimum for a beat or two. Look to see if the audience is still with you, and then feel free to react to the joke yourself. Professional comics work very hard on establishing an emotional connection to their audience. Let your audience know that you're sharing a funny story with trusted friends. People will overlook certain mistakes in the setup if they trust the person telling the joke.


Nothing beats practice, so rehearse that joke you heard enough times to make it sound natural. The more times you tell the joke, the more details you can add. Professional comics sometimes tell the same basic joke for years, but the audience still laughs. It's all in the delivery, so work on your own delivery and timing and you'll reap the benefits of a joke well-told.

[twatteaser]

My Secret Weapon

I used this book when I was on my rampages. I like getting different drinks each time. Some people believe that being a pain with custom drinks will get you nowhere fast. There is some merit to this theory, particularly if launched in the beginning of the chase.

My trademark drink, a Mongolian Mother Fucker is in there. It is basically an Alabama Slammer Mixed with a Long Island Ice Tea. 13 ingredients in there and confuses some barmaids, but it is not hard to make at all.

This book is good for those who care to experience more than just a Coors Light and a pack of smokes when out drinking. I used to carry it with me every time I went out and it is convenient to fit in a Sport Coat’s inner pocket or jacket. I have had more people try and steal this book than anything else I have ever owned. Barmaids love to acquire this from people, so watch out. In the end it does constitute a prop for the chase if you will. It is also a good conversation starter as it has been passed around the bar to customers asking, “What is that you’re making for him?”

The current edition is owned by Secjay with 2600 recipes for drinks with handy indexes alphabetically as well as by major ingredients like drinks with Jack Daniels as an example. It also has a wine guide for those who care not to be the most ignorant on the subject.

I picked all my various editions from Winter 2000 till December of this year at the checkout line of my local mega alcohol store on my area. The book is a nice black spiral edition that was written by Stephen Kittredge Cunningham. It is called The Bartender's Black Book: The Drink Recipe Collection for the 21st Century. I don’t think the current edition is on Amazon but an older one. Maybe Secjay will tell us what edition it is?

This optional and not really needed but just recommended.

[twatteaser]

Different camps of thought on how to wind up with a barmaid Part 1.

This was brought to my attention from a good friend who has more familarity with NLP than I do. This clipped section belongs to Tyler Durden. From what I read he has particularly interesting strategies for chasing paid hotties, which technically our beloved barmaid falls under. I brought this here for the simple fact that other strategies may lead some some light on what strategies to use.


Reframing is altering the meaning or value of something, by altering its context or description.

Reframing is a powerful change stratagem. It changes our perceptions, and this may then affect our actions. But does changing our symbolic representation of the real world actually change anything in the real world itself?



Frame Setting - forcing frames on hotties
Force girls into the frame that you *need* her to be in, in order to sarge her.

EVERYONE wants to be perceived as GENUINE. When girls put up FRONTS, call them out on their ungenuine bullshit behaviour to put them in line.

Jeans store girl
PUA: "are we in talk mode, or sales mode?"
HB: "well, sorta both.."
PUA: (stick out tongue) "pffffffft!!"
HB: no no no.. go on, go on, I'm in talk mode..
PUA: ok (spin handshake to return her into state)

Shooter girl
HB: would you like a shooter?
PUA: hmm... I'm not sure that we'd get along..
HB: what?? why?????
PUA: We're too similar..
HB: why???
PUA: I can't tell you.. We haven't known eachother for long enough..
HB: hahahhaah..
PUA: get this (routine)
HB: hey cool.. so would you like something to drink?
PUA: (make funny face, continue with NEXT routine, utterly IGNORING her
question.. use high-5s, hugs, "I love you", or anything OTHER than the answer to her question)
HB: hahaha, ok SERIOUSLY do you want a shooter..
PUA: are you in shooter girl mode or in genuine mode?
HB: well I'm working..
PUA: pfffft! (backturn)
HB: no no no.. I'm listening, keep going..
PUA: (run sarge as usual)

Waitress
PUA: talking talking... run A-crowd routine, validate her as part of your
a-crowd..
HB: cool.. so what do you want tonight sir?
PUA: hold up.. are we still chatting or are you in waitress mode?
HB: well I am waitressing..
PUA: uh oh.. I'm not sure if you're still A-crowd with us anymore..
HB: no no no, I'm just talking.. keep going..
PUA: high-5.. Ok, get this........

Girl with bitchshield at a night venue (club/bar/etc)
HB: x-ignorant comment
PUA: "are you in bar mode or daytime mode?"
HB: what???
PUA: I think that you treat people differently at the bar than during the daytime.. I'm just trying to talk to you, and I don't think that you're like this (hand gesture <-/ -> to motion to your conversation) during the day.. This isn't genuine.. I don't think its you.. (for serious bitch shields you can add: "this is second class behaviour")
HB: yeah but all these lame desperate guys try to hit on me in lame ways..
PUA: my intuition about you is that you respect yourself enough to come only to a place where the people are worth talking to.. just chill.. be genuine.. I can totally see that you have x-quality going for you.. I think that you're probably x-compliment.. (spin-handshake to re-initiate her state, so it doesn't go too downhill state-wise).

Stripper
HB: where are you from?
PUA: (NOT answering her question) these are 'mark' questions, for customers.. this isn't you..
HB: what?
PUA: actually you'd better run along and make some money or your boss might get mad..
HB: I have no boss.. I work when I want..
PUA: oh, so you're saying that you have the freewill to exert your own power of choice and talk to who you want.. I like that, that's powerful.. (then IGNORE all 'mark' questions NO MATTER WHAT, and pump her with routines).
NOTHING situational whatsoever, because as a stripper she has heard it ALL NIGHT.. just intrigue her and neg, neg, neg, etc...

(BTW the spin handshake is where you go to shake her hand, then move it round so she spins, but loosen your grip so that her hand turns round inside yours, if that makes sense. It's much easier to do 2 handed.)

[twatteaser]

Sorry, I should have mentioned that 90% of usually intelligent guys don't get it. What is so hard about it, is what I want to know. I can't find a description in TylerDurden's archive but this is mine;

Reach out your right hand and she does the same, standard handshake. Then, move your arm in an upwards arc to your right.

To get a better idea of how it works, stand up and hold your hand out, pretend to be the chick and that someone is doing it to you (the handshake, that is). As the chick, your arm moves in an upward arc to your left, but because you are holding the guys hand you have to twist your body or your arm gets broken.

She will get the idea and know you mean to spin her. As long as your in a playful state she'll go do it, because it's such a rare and radical thing to randomly do (especially in street PU). Now, you have to keep holding her hand, but loosen your grip to let it turn inside your hand, or else after she spins your arm will be twisted anti-clockwise.

After she has been spun, she'll be thinking 'wow what was that!?' in street PU, or 'wow how cool!' in club PU. Instant smile. I never tried it on a barmaid, maybe you would be the first to attempt it? I dunno if it would work over a bar, maybe for you since you probably have a great reach.

Two handed (like in the skin kiss maneuver I sent you) it is a lot easier, and more 'dramatic'. That plus ballsy kino when running your hands down her sides, it's like her buying temperature instantly jumps for a short time, just because of the smoothness of it. If you break the kiss off first it is also good. Only do the spin kiss two handed though.

'Buying temperature' is TylerDurden's way of measuring different levels of what girls are willing to let you do, like, enough to let you talk to her, enough to let you isolate her, enough to let you kiss her, fuck her etc. The guy invents a new term and often a bonus acronym in almost every post he makes.

I hope this helps, if you try it I'd love to hear your experiences.

Special Thanks to my Unnameable Helper with this post! Without him I wouldn't even know how to begin to explain this!

[twatteaser]

PLAYING HARD TO GET - BEING A CHALLENGE - BEING THE PRIZE by Tyler Durden

I talked about posting some more advanced material for guys who are interested. Here is a first helping. If you're not interested in dense material, read something else.

This is one of the most important posts I've written in some time, and it will likely go misunderstood given that most guys will not have the field experience to appreciate it. It is the most important thread I've posted in six months.

For guys who can gain attraction very consistently, but still have trouble getting laid: read this post until you have it down.

A few things to keep in mind, I want to throw out here:

-Buying Temperature Spikes
-S/C Switch (Screening vs Chasing switch)
-Social hook point and sexual hook point
-Female psychology (autopilot responses, socially conditioned buying temperature regulation, value responses, choice making fuck rationalizations)
-Bodylanguage subcommunication of hard-to-getness (the idea of not saying you're hard to get, but communicating it with your bodylanguage)

***This post is directed towards girls who you ascertain are attracted to challenging guys. Not all girls are like this, but many hot girls are. Again, many aren't. For guys use or advocate other styles which don't make use of this sort of stuff, the reason that they are getting laid is that they using other means of getting laid. There is more than one style. This post is something that is useful for guys in my context, and if you're using a totally different style than me, then this stuff may be useless to you.


SOME ROUGH THOUGHTS ON FEMALE PSYCHOLOGY:

Many of the hottest girls are extremely responsive to hard to get guys. Anyone in field has experienced the scenario where he plays hard to get and having the girl chase, but as soon as he shows interest he is blown out. This can happen even as late as the bedroom. Like, you'll have a girl chasing you all night, isolate you back home, but because you make the first move, she locks up and the pickup is over.

There are several reasons behind this, and in any given situation the lockup may have been caused by one or all of the reasons.

Firstly, you have autopilot responses. Think to the last time that you walked down the street, and a vagrant asked you for change. Perhaps you said "no", and kept walking. You don't consider it a lie. It's just an autopilot response to a social situation. Girls are the same with the LJGD ("let's just go dance") or "let's go to the bathroom", when their buying temperature goes down and their logical social conditioning kicks in and says "This guy is trying to sleep with us. He may be attractive, but who cares, I'm not meeting a guy at a club. I'm leaving this situation to go dance, because that's why I came to the club in the first place."

Notice also, how in all of the times that you've told a vagrant "no" when you were asked for spare change, there were those few times when someone asked you for help, and you said "no" out of habit, when in fact as you walked off you might have thought to yourself "Shit, maybe that guys' car really did break down. He didn't look like a vagrant. I wonder if I was a dick to him?"

The same goes for girls. They'll screen guys out as an auto-pilot response, and later wonder if they made a mistake (but they don't care, because another guy will come along in two seconds anyway). Attraction and how alpha or how sexual you are is not a factor here. Even very attractive guys get screened out for no logical reason. This is purely an autopilot response that you have to recognize and dodge. That is why we use opening tactics - they open consistently.

Likewise, girls will leave a set as their buying temperature increases too fast, as an autopilot response. They think "I don't know this guy. This guy knows what he's doing, and probably does it to all the girls. I'm getting out of here." This is why we use fractionation tactics, so as to avoid her disengaging you. Note also, that typical C&F push/pull is NOT a fractionation tactic. C&F and the like is not indirect, even if you are flirting around that you are hard to get. Girls know that if you're taking the time to engage them, even in a C&F hard to get flirtish type way, that it is not the case that you are *legitimately* hard to get. This is in the same way that when a girl comes up to me and says that my shirt is stupid - I know that she wants me. There is no difference. C&F is simply a *competent* way of flirting, that says a million and one great things about you. It's still (arguably, depending on semantics) a direct approach in some ways. It's just a direct approach that girls like, because it still shows that you are willing to walk away - you're interested, but you can take it or leave it. So that said, you can see how "You're my new girlfriend.. No wait, you don't have x-whatever? We're broken up." is not a fractionation technique. It's highly competent flirting, but its not *actually* conveying that you don't want her in a way where she really believes it.

**If I had to pinpoint one reason why guys who come to this stuff have trouble getting results, its what is outlined in this post. Girls are used to sex going down in a certain way. Walking up to girls and overtly trying to pick them up goes against what they're used to. It's a violation of social norms. Girls will tolerate it as cute, and they'll be interested to see what you'll do. But they'll rarely sleep with you (unless they are at a certain point in their lives where they are open to the idea, which I'll post about below in terms of "fuck rationalizations" - and this does happen often, which accounts for alot of the success that we see with other styles of approaches). Guys go in trying to convince the girl, when they should be BAITING the girl into convincing THEM. As a result, most of the bold moves that guys who come to the scene attempt, wind up not yielding any results.

So back on female psychology then, why do girls like *actual* hard to get guys?

Girls naturally enjoy having their buying temperature pumped up high. So if they can get those emotions out of an interaction, without worrying that the guy will exploit her suggestable state and have sex with her, then she can just get all emotionally aroused around him, and enjoy it. Of course what happens from there is that she backwards rationalizes it, and then convinces herself that she legitimately wants the guy. From there, she decides that she's going to get the guy, and starts chasing him in a manner as unsophisticated and blatantly obvious as how a pissed drunk AFC would chase a girl that he wants at a party. She'll kino him, giggle and scream around him, compliment him, signal her friends to help her, and try to isolate him.

Notice, as this post goes on, that this last paragraph explains why just getting a girls' buying temperature up high is not good enough, and that she actually has to chase. It's because of the backwards rationalization process, and the sexual hook point that she crosses over as a result. The S/C switch (screen/chase) gets flipped.

There are also issues of validation at work. Notice that if you tell a girl "I hate you", she starts touching you immediately, and begs to know why. Notice that if you engage the whole set, but actively ignore the choice girl, she'll start trying to get you to talk to her. This is all validation. It's more validating for the often insecure hot girls, to sleep with a guy who will reinforce that she is beautiful.

Think about your last cute girlfriend. She was cute. She was great in bed. But sooner or later, you got used to it, and took it for granted. Your relationship started stagnating. Then you're out at a party one night, and all these guys are giving her attention. Her friends are there, and she's having a great time just doing her own thing. All of a sudden, she looks different. She seems different. You say to your friend, "You know man, I was just thinking how cool Kathy is. I really want to stick with her." Then she comes over, and sits with you. And its like "Wow, I actually have this girl with me. This is awesome".

Haa - she's no different than she was an hour ago when you were sick of her. But when you can tell that someone doesn't need you, they just SEEM different. There's something about it that's hard to articulate. But what it boils down to, is that all of a sudden, this person's attention has become a source of validation for you. And as a result, they seem more attractive. (BTW: I use the paragraph before this one as a killer routine in sets, except I take out the part about stagnation and focus more on how I know that I appreciate someone and the positive sides of it).

In addition to the validation issue, there are basic genetic/status explainations and accounts for why hard to get guys are appealing. Very basically, guys who are sexually pre-selected by other girls because of their genetics and/or social status will be hard to get, because they can't be bothered with chasing women. They simply walk around, and girls chase them. Chasing a girl is in some ways subcommunicating that you are not one of these guys. If you go to the high class venues in Los Angeles, the mere act of actively picking up is looked down on by the highly socially proofed guys. They'll say things like "That guy over there is trying to pull ass. Kick him out."

A counter argument is that an alphamale will see a girl that he wants, and will just go up and assume the sell. This can also work, if you genuinely come across that way, and if you have the followup to back it up congruently.

Generally though, this is uncommon. Natural PUAs generally just walk around, and girls give them AIs (approach invitations) or make it really easy for them by throwing themselves at them, in a way that most surrounding men just don't recognize (and women don't acknowledge, as this would be a breach of "Secret Society" to admit what's happening, and would break down their whole system of secretly being the CHOOSERS). Note, that the idea of the alphamale who does approaches in society is a SOCIAL MISCONCEPTION. This rarely happens. Generally, natural alphamales do not do cold approaches. I've travelled all over North America and Europe, and I rarely see it. I know exactly what to look for - and I *rarely* see them initiating cold approaches. It happens only in certain communities, like London and NYC. But this is very very uncommon, and even in these communities 99% of the naturals who get laid often are still not doing cold approaches.

[twatteaser]

The ideas that "men take all the risks in escalation" and "men do the approaching, women do the receiving", that the academic community of psychologists and zoologists have espoused is BAD DATA. It is literally a fallacy and blemish of the academic community. It is a pathetic and glaring example of the follies of academia's white ivory tower armchair theorism, from eggheads who couldn't put any of their theory into practice if you gave them 10 years of prepare it (this is a gripe that I have as a student of political and analytic philosophy, that I see transferred over into this field as well). What these social scientists don't see (AFCs that they are), while they're watching all of the interactions that they supposedly use as empirical data in their published studies (which influence social understandings and thus social conditioning), is that while the men are the ones approaching and escalating, it is the women who are throwing themselves at these clueless men, until they do something. So in that case, the woman has virtually ALREADY DECIDED that she wants the man, and from there she just doesn't admit it (secret society breach), but rather throws herself at the guy until he escalates. She even puts up silly shit tests like (this from a double lay that SB007 and I did on a 2set that we pulled) "Just because you're renting that hotel, doesn't mean we're going up with you."... and later on in the night .... "just because we came up here, doesn't mean we're sleeping with you.." And typical AFCs, will say "Wow, we really plowed through that resistance", when in fact these girls had chosen to sleep with SB007 and I LONG before we'd taken them back to the hotel that we rented right in front of them. We were the hard to get guys, and just let them play out their dramatic act of throwing themselves at us in subtle ways, while pretending that they we didn't know what was happening. And then we allowed them to structure the extraction while making it look like it was our idea and not their fault, and then afterwards they denied responsibility for what took place, while they still email us regularly and want to meet up again. These girls would claim that we chose them, when in fact they chose us - which few people realize is the way it almost always happens.

The idea that "girls choose" also stems from the male/female social dynamic in our society, and the practises and habits that spawn from it. Men are unconsciously giving sexual validation to attractive women all day long, in one way or another. It's either they're checking them out, asking them the time, trying to make small talk, or pivoting left instead of right as they walk out of a room - when it would be faster to pivot left but he can catch a glimpse of her by pivoting right. Girls are all too aware of this stuff. It's built into them. They also go to the club religiously, to relish the process of guys buying them drinks and checking them out, and then shooting them down. A quote over from literally the hottest girl on my campus two months ago after an off-night: "I'm so depressed. No guys approached me tonight. I would never get together with a guy from a club, but I can't believe that I didn't get approached."

So what winds up happening, is that girls get into a pattern of not seeking out sex. They tend to go in cycles, where rather than chasing sex, they simply decide to give it up at arbitrary times. "This is the day that I will give it up." So for example, a typical girl will have a "revenge" fuck, a "just broke up with my boyfriend rebound" fuck, a "I haven't gotten laid in exactly 6 months" fuck, a "I'm on vacation and there are no social consequences and I just want to have fun" fuck, a "I need to revalidate myself being snubbed to prove I'm beautiful" fuck, a "romantic tryst adventure" fuck, a "jump on the sword so my friend can have her guy" fuck, a "I haven't gone home with a guy before, and all my friends have and I want to try it" fuck, etc etc etc. Then of course there is the "I've been dating this guy 3 months, and he provides well and its time to give it up now" fuck, which is the one that we typically aren't concerned about on this chat forum.

The girl has had sex available to her continually, but she can't "give it up" at every opportunity that comes around, because she'd wind up sleeping with 15,000 different men by the time she was finished. So instead, she comes up with rationalizations of when and where to give it up.

Thus, it is the case that girls are in the habit of making the choice. The second that they see that the guy is trying to make the choice for them, the sequence is broken, and their auto-pilot response kicks in and they automatically go back to screening him (even if they like him), just as they had on every other day prior to this one. (Don't make the mistake of thinking that you still don't have to do the work in making up BS excuses so that it isn't the girls' fault, once the ball is rolling. That is a different story. It still has to be "not hard fault". What's being discussed here is a separate issue from that).

This is the fallacy that guys make when approaching. They think that they can choose the girl, because they've pumped her buying temperature and she's been receptive to it. In practice though, if the S/C Switch doesn't flip, she'll still just sit back and enjoy the emotions, without having to give up anything in return. That's when you get situations where the girl will hang with you alll night, but won't give up her #, or she'll give it but she'll flake, or she'll give insurmountable LMR even if you extract.

That's because the right SEQUENCE hasn't been initiated, to make her "Today is the day" switch flip (where she'll pick from one of the many fuck-rationalizations, in the heat of the moment). And that sequence is "Guy is attractive. I can't take it anymore, so today is the day. I choose guy. I throw myself at him in oblique ways that he can't directly prove is me actually doing it. He eventually notices my actions and picks me up. I do nothing to help it move along, but if he makes everything happen and alleviates me of responsibility then it happens. He takes the credit for picking me up." The sequence is NOT "Guy walks up and tries to attract me. I decide that I'm attracted. I let him fuck me."

For that reason, the guy may have switched every attraction switch in the book in terms of buying temperature, but unless she is the one making the choice, the S/C switch will not be flipped. She is attracted, but her thought process is STILL occupied with trying to find every reason possible not to let anything happen.

She must switch from the typical mode of perpetual screening, to chasing. Her THOUGHT PROCESS must be switched. She must believe that you are a guy who is a source of attraction (ie: buying temperature escalation), but that you are not intentionally doing it to her. This is the same reason that if you tell a girl that you study 'pickup', she will be offended. You are breaking the sequence that is protected via the Secret Society, so to speak. You are messing up their ability to make a "good" choice.

From there, she has switched into chase mode. She is no longer dwelling whatsoever on why she shouldn't do anything (as she would be perpetually, if she thought that you were trying to lay her). Now, she's focused only on how to make it happen with you. Her thought process has changed. The S/C Switch has been flipped. She's focused solely on making it happen (except that she's not admitting to herself that she's trying to "get laid" - nope - she's just trying to continue the interaction back to somewhere that it could happen, despite that she deep down knows that she IS trying to get laid, but won't actively admit it to herself).

So that said, how do you trip that switch early on? Let's look at some straight tactics.

*****


FLIPPING THE S/C SWITCH, VIA TIMED FRACTIONATION ON BUYING TEMPERATURE SPIKES:

What is a buying temperature spike? You've all seen it. It's when you do or say something to give the girl a quick shot of emotions. Like a C&F remark where she goes "Oh!" and swats you. Or you tell her that you know something that she wants to know bad, and she goes "OMG OMG OMG, tell me tell me tell me!" Or when you run a really tight story that has her dying laughing or excited or intrigued. Or if you do a DHV, like the coin snatch trick or Mystery's 3 and 7 routine, and she freaks out. Or a great joke. Or even just coming in strong with good bodylanguage and tonality, and sucking up the attention of everyone in the set, and her buying temperature shoots up (you see this when you go in with an opener, and the girls just jump to talk to you or answer your question). Whatever.

You see it on their face, and you see it in the way that they turn their bodylanguage towards you, and when they kino you. Her buying temperature has shot up. Usually, it hits in abrupt bursts. Little spikes on the graph. You know you can't *maintain* this level indefinetely, but you can hit that level in bursts.

These buying temperature spikes are the right time to start doing subtle takeaways. That is, not the kind of takeaway where you walk off into another set. Rather, you just break eyecontact with her, and face away a bit. You *exactly* what the girls do to you, when you're gaming them in a club, and they get distracted because a peice of your material is not strong enough. You turn to your friends or the bar or the dancefloor, and you make it look like you're about to leave.

[twatteaser]

*But*, girls are very much accostomed to getting what they want. So unlike most guys who will give up, their instant reaction is to go "HEY HEY HEY, keep talking.. What were you saying??? What???"

That is your first step in getting the girls chasing. You have conveyed that you might walk away at any point, and all of the aforementioned issues are now dealt with. You are an attractive guy, and you have very clearly (in such a subtle way) demonstrated that you are not trying to get her. IOW, the natural process of her becoming attracted to you and choosing you has begun.

This kind of timing takes time and practice to cultivate. It can also be learned right off the opener. Here are some examples:

OPENER CLASS: "BAIT OPENERS" - SPIKE BUYING TEMPERATURE, AND TAKEAWAY TO BAIT HER TO OPEN YOU

1- "I'm shy":
My friend Shannon walks up to a set. I walk up to her and she introduces me. I say "Hey, I'm shy" with a super cocky look on my face, and turn to Shannon and say "Let's go outside". Here I looked like a cocky cool and fun guy, who they were about to get a little bit of buying temperature entertainment from - gratuitous entertainment for their night. But I *spotted* that look on their face, so I automatically took it away. *But*, I left a hook that they could grab on to. I said "Hey, I'm shy", and then turned to Shannon as if I were about to leave. In fact, I wasn't, but knew that they'd force me to stay. From there, they scream "Why are you shy?! Why are you shy?! Don't go.. Why are you shy?!", and I roll back in and game them. You can also use "I hate you", "I hate you guys", or "I hate girls". These work amazingly well as followups, and work well when you're merging into a set with your wing. Again, the girls say "Why?? Whyyyy?!??"

2- Eyecodes and bluffing that you're entering the set, and flashing peacocky zipper:
I walk by some guys who are gaming a set poorly. I walk right up to the set, and do "let's go" girl eye code to the girls (I roll my eyes, like "These guys are tools"). I also make little eye movements down to where their hands are too eagerly touching the girls, and make eye movements at the beers that they bought for them, and smirk right after I see them. The girls know what's up - they can tell that I know the deal of how women are. I walk right up like I'm about to out-alpha the guys, but then shake my head a bit like "This is too lame for me to even bother with", and then back away while still maintaining eye contact with the girls. Here I am using my PRESENCE as something that will give them a quick buying temperature level spike, and then I am withdrawing. I then proceed to tug on the zipper of my very peacocky zipper covered (BAIT) vest, and look from her eyes down to my vest. I have provided the bait. The girls immediately go "Hey! That vest is awesome! Let me see! Let me see!", and blow off the guys and jump over to me.

3- Take over set with C&F comment and AMOG blaster:
I look over from my barstool, and plow in with booming tonality some C&F comments, and proceed to shoot a quick out-alpha routine on the AMOG. For anyone who read my FR last week, it was a coment about a girl saying that everyone thought she had fake breasts. I yelled over "That's great - they'll give you boyancy if we're ever lost at sea. You'll be the only one to survice". Both girls look at me, and are intrigued. Then the AMOG says "Hey, this is my girlfriend", and I reply with "Haa, cool.. You guys look so similar, I thought that you guys were brother and sister. If you guys have kids they'll look like (I do a funny impression)." I then make a comment to the guy that he owns this end of the bar, turn my barstool around, and takeaway. Again, I have come in with COOLER presence than everyone else. I added energy to the group, which spiked up the girls' buying temperature, and then noticing that I immediately took it away. The girls immediately re-open me.

4- Opinion opener:
This is something that I do all the time with Sickboy007. Like all the time. This is key to our game. We roll into set talking amongst ourselves. Like we are the coolest guys in the club, and not needy at all. We're having more fun in our own conversation than we could be talking to anyone else. (Note: We usually actually ARE, so this is congruent. We talk about cool shit while we're in the field, and joke around alot. This keeps our state up, and is much better than talking game in field and getting too analytical). Despite being both guys, because we are both cool we actually provide more social proof to eachother than a female pivot would. So right off the bat, we look like best friends who could care less if they'll talk to us or not, because we are cooler and more interesting than them. We tap one of the girls, and run the first line of the opinion opener. They're thinking "Wow, those cool looking guys we saw are actually coming over to talk to us". Then they give their answer, and I we immediately turn our bodylanguage away from facing them, and into eachother. Then we assimilate their answer into our conversation, and transition into joking around about other shit that the girls DON'T GET, but it sounds interesting. So the girls see that we basically just tooled them to add to our own fun, and they can see that our conversation is so fucking interesting that they want to join it very badly. After all, we weren't rude. We just didn't follow them like puppydogs, like most guys would. So notice that the hook has been laid. The girls will interrupt us, and say 'Why did you ask us that? What about David Bowie?? What?? What?? How old is your little sister??" They keep trying to get in, and win us into a conversation.


**Notice that in all these cases, I'm laying the bait on the hook, and then pulling it back. I don't actually walk away. I just make the initial body movements that I'm about to walk away, because of the way that I pivot my body. But I'm not actually walking away. In fact, I'm not going anywhere. I know that if I lay the hook right, they'll start trying to re-open ME. It's all in hitting it at the *exact* moment, and then turning as if you're about to walk away, but providing some bait that they can open you off of, so they don't have to think too hard (God forbid).

IMPORTANT:
In addition to setting the hard to get frame, there are other things being laid down here that will help your pickup as it goes along. When you come in with a straight opener, and then start talking, she will often go into "receptive mode". An example that I do in seminar to explain this, is I'll be talking for an hour, and then out of nowhere I'll point to a student and say "Hey man. Do me a favour. Say the coolest thing that you can think of right now. Just say any random cool thing. Whatever you want." *Never* has a student been able to do it. They just sit there gawking, and they can't think of a single thing to say. Likewise, nobody else in the room can either. That's because their brain has been in "receive" mode for the last hour. They've been sucking up all the info, and their mental process of calling things up isn't in gear. It's like doing your math homework. Your first problem takes you 10 minutes. Your second one, 5. Then every one after that takes 1 minute each. That's because your brain has engaged into "math mode". Likewise, if the girl is just listening and listening, she won't be able to qualify herself to you very easily, because she's too busy taking what you're saying all in. So what winds up happening (and many guys will recognize this phenomenon), is that a pause occurs in the conversation, and because the girl feels the emotion of discomfort that she can't think of a way to fill it, she immediately says "Cool. Anyway, I have to go dance now". And POW, even though she was digging you, she left because the emotion of not having anything to say sunk her buying temperature so quickly. Another reason, is because by talking so much, you're logically disengaging her so strongly, that the sudden cognitive shift from the emotional saturation of being gamed without having to contribute anything, to suddenly actually having to (God forbid) THINK about what to say, will slam gear shift her brain into logical thinking so fast, that its like slamming your car from 5th to first gear, while driving 100 down the freeway. So better, is to get BOTH her mind thinking of what to say, and buying temperature still escalating. This happens, because she's getting excited by the process of actually gaming you. You've baited her into selling herself on you. This is a basic persuasion tactic. Nothing more. Before she's even had a chance to decide whether or not she even wants you, you're already taking away the option. But of what she's seen of you, you spike her buying temperature, so she felt high attraction for the second that you were there. That way, when its time for her to pipe in, she can easily think of something to say, and the set will hold, AND she'll be more likely to be able to qualify herself to you.

[twatteaser]

And that said, they often WILL do things to qualify themselves to you. You can AMPLIFY this again, with some playful hard to get tactics.

This is a really fucking key peice. Pay close attention to it. Say for example, you went in with "I'm shy", and then pulled out. They'll say "Why are you shy? We're nice girls!" You can reply "Umm yeah.. You're OK.. Oh shit, you have a belly button ring. Don't show me that." Immediately, you'll see them jumping up and pulling your face down to look at their peircing. They'll say "Look at it! Loooook at it!!!!" Then you look at it, and like they've entranced you, you talk to them a bit more.

The same can be done after you exchange signs. They'll tell you that they're Libras, and you say "I can't talk to you anymore.. You're trouble". This is as if you're moderating your own buying temperature. You turn your back on them, and they'll grab your shoulder and say "NO!! You tell me your sign NOW!! Are you a Libra too?!?!"

Another one you'll see alot, is that you run the hook, and pull back. Typical girl tactics, they'll start touching you. So say that they touch your shoulder. You can act like it feels really good. You mumble "That actually feels really good - my shoulder is so sore. You have to stop doing that.. Stop.. Seriously.. That's a bad idea.." They'll do it more and more. "OK, you're getting me all emotional.. enough.."

Even without hook openers though (which I only use a small percentage of the time), I can still engage the chasing just further into the set. It doesn't require that you do it right off the opener like in the case of hook openers. Its convenient if you can do it early, but it isn't required at all. The only time limit is that the dynamic isn't set in stone that you're too giving and eager. So long as I avoid that scenario, I will only do it off the opener if I spot a buying temperature spike. Otherwise, I proceed as normal, until I see it.

I do the same on tonguedowns. I'll be kissing the girl, and then I'll pull back, and mumble "OK, stop.. We seriously have to stop." They'll say "Why?" and keep trying to push more. You say "I'm just getting so....." and then they'll pull you back in. Do this repeatedly. This is an extension to the Style kiss close, where he goes in with "I'm trying so hard not to kiss you right now".

Basically, the idea here is that you BAIT the girl, by giving her information on how to seduce you, but telling her not to do it.

The thing is though, that you have to be congruent with it. You actually use your bodylanguage at various points, to deliberately try to screw up your own pickup. Because girls are used to getting what they want, they'll re-initiate it HARD. This is NOT just a verbal thing. It's a bodylanguage thing. Girls respond to how you use your body. Try to speak using your body.

This is very similar to martial arts. It's like "parry, strike, dodge, parry, strike, dodge.. strike.. etc etc.." You're going "Hit up buying temperature, pull back.. Give her an idea of how to seduce you, pull back.. Give a bit.. Hit up buying temperature again.. Pull back.. Hit up buying temperature again.. Pull back.. Give her an idea.. Pull back.. etc etc"

From there, when I do extractions or get a phone number, I also make them work for it. Often, they'll be walking away and say they have to go. I'll say "OK" and just look at them blank. They'll immediately offer their # or to take mine. But that aside, I also use bait to make them go for it. I'll wait until they say something cool, and I'll act like a girl whose buying temperature just shot up. I'll look intrigued or excited and say "Wow. Geez, I have to take you to x-place". I'll pick something that I know they want bad. Something that they'll react to. Or I'll just use something ordinary, but I'll map out a scenario (using future adventures projection of us doing awesome stuff), and just go with that. They'll immediately offer up their number. Then I'll say "OK cool", and just change the subject. Just like how a girl does to guys. What's next is funny to watch. She'll start trying to naturally "slip in" that I should take her number. I'll keep saying "Yeah cool, I'll get it later". I keep doing this, until she's asked me to exchange numbers around 5-15 times over the next hour. Often they'll just ask me for my number out of concern that I won't call. When I finally acknowledge that I'll call is when she does something impressive. Then I'll say "WOW.. What was your number again? I'm definetely calling you." Moreover, girls will also try to extract me for food after the club closes. I'll say "Yeah awesome!" but then turn to my wing and keep talking to him. They keep pushing for it, and they'll run and grab their friend and try to make their friend convince me as well. Then I'll capitulate.
I may not necessarily wait for them to initiate it. Many just won't. So instead, I'll wait for them to do something to impress me, and then I'll suggest it. If they're giving me a backrub, I may say "I'm hungry. I want to go to Denny's after this."

But I do the same in the other direction. I act just like a flakey stimulus seeking girl. If they bore me, I just walk off in distraction. If something interesting happens, I'll walk over to it to check it out. If a good song comes on, I may just get up and walk away. If they say something I don't like, I'll lean away and start looking at other girls. They have to keep tapping me on the shoulder and tell me to keep talking, in order for me to stay attentive.

So how do you seduce in a case where the act of seducing would be incongruent to everything you've built up. They play it up, and the girl tries to get them, but then they stupidly go against everything that they've been doing get them attracted all this time, and start trying to seduce them. This is incongruent. It kills attraction instantly. It relies on some fallacy that the girl likes you for your personality, when in fact she may, but it is not relevant to her *attraction* for you. You're switching gears too quickly, from 5th to 1st gear, in one foul swoop. It doesn't work. Attraction dies instantly. I've had girls who went completely cold, even after spending hours with me - all because I dropped the hard to get act, and started trying to escalate - without doing the right transition work (I will explain).

Instead, you have to play it smooth. This requires you to have strong verbal skills and calibration skills. The girl has been getting you comfortable being closer and closer to her the whole time, so its fine if you're right next to her, and even in kino. But you have to keep presenting challenges to her, and punishing and rewarding her with those challenges. She'll say something that I like, and I'll lean in like I'm about to kiss her. Then I won't. I'll slowly start moving back, until she says something else that I like. Then I move in closer than the first time. Then I move slowly back. Then she says something that I like, and I move right in to kiss her, and say "You're getting me all emotional", and pull back. Then I keep my face up to hers, and we talk face to face, with lips grazing eachother, and she says something I like and turn my face and stop talking, and then her talking will merge into triangular gazing and my lips will graze hers more and then we're making out. I may also say "I'm not going to" at different points, when she's obviously trying to move in to kiss me. If she says "Not going to what?", I won't answer. Rather, I'll just keep talking in the quiet face-to-face way that we've been doing.

Also - again, you can do things like "You're wearing Channel? Don't let me smell it.. Don't..." (she'll practically tackle you and put her neck up to your face to make you smell it). Then you can phase shift, but then snap your own state and move back. But as you're moving back, you say things to pump her buying temperature.

A GREAT thing to reward girls for is also dancing in front of you, or in between your legs. Although they'd never admit it (Secret Society Breach), dancing is a sexual exhibition. So if you can make her perceive that her dancing is what's getting your buying temperature up, she'll feel fully qualified. You kiss her, but you still don't keep trying. You just do it, and then sit there blank afterwards. She still has more to do.

Remember that this is like fucking with magnets. You're constantly backing off, but doing it SPECIFICALLY at a time when you know you've spiked buying temperature, so that she'll chase the stimulus.

That's the part that's so hard to convey in text. I show this to guys in workshop no problem, but I can't explain it that well. You have to actually take the time to mentally catalogue all of the little bodylanguage mannerisms that girls use, when they're getting distracted. And then you use these on them. And when you use them, you have to TIME it just at the right time - right when you hit on the right emotion. Always remember that there are so many fucking little ways that you reveal that you really want her. It only takes the slightest slip, and the jig is up. You have to be congruent.

Note that if you pull away at the wrong time when her buying temperature is down, she'll backwards rationalize that she is not experiencing attraction, and that she's not attracted to you anymore and that she's HAPPY that you're backing off. This will end it. So you have to have the verbal game and physical coquettishness to play this up properly.

Now as for seducing, this is like trapping an animal that you've baited closer and closer. If you do decide to pounce on her, do it ONLY once she has been baited too close, and she won't be able to get away. What I mean by that, is do it only once you have her lying with you snuggling, and then you can start playing your late game. If you do it prior to that, her physical horniness from contact with you won't have kicked in yet, and she'll have nothing to counter-act the state breaker that you dropping the hard to get act was playing up.

Notice, btw, that there is both a social hook point and a sexual hook point. Style has talked about the "hook point", as the point in the pickup in which the girls have stopped wondering "why is this guy talking to us", and have decided that they don't want you to leave. They'll do things to help the conversation continue, and your life becomes much easier. The same goes down the line, where there is a sexual hook point. You'll see this alot, especially with girls on vacation. This is where they've actually decided that they want to hook up with you. If you get this kind of girl, you'll notice zero LMR down the line. If you escalate, she will not resist IF she feels that she worked hard enough to get you. If not, then her desire to meet a challenge has not been fulfilled, and instead she thinks "Haa, he wants me for no reason like everyone else. What a chump."


=====

Anyway, in summary, a few points to have taken from this are:

1- There is a natural social process that occurs, which women don't want you to know about. They want you to think that you're the one who picked them up, so they don't have to "be responsible" for it. However, this fallacy has spawned guys in this community to develop pickup styles that violate social practices, in a way that isn't effective. (I violate social practices myself, but in a way that nobody spots). That's why when you talk about hitting on girls, the girls don't like it. But if you ask them "How *would* you like a guy to hit on you?" they have no realistic reply. It's because they secretly know that they pickup guys, but don't admit it publically or even to themselves.

2- Being able to attract a girl is often not enough. Girls find themselves wanting to sleep with various guys that they see all day long. What it takes to actually get laid, is to flip her S/C switch, so that she's decided "Today is the day. This guy is the guy". This is why there are many guys in the scene who can run a tight set, but still don't get laid. They have a certain part of their game down, but need to work more on flipping that fucking S/C Switch.

3- Being aware of buying temperature spikes, and knowing WHEN to pull away is key. If you just pull away at arbitrary times, you will not get a result.

4- Guys think that looks is the most important part of a pickup. In fact, its brains. You have to be smart as fucking hell to do this stuff. You have to think fast on your feet, and you have to calibrate. Most guys don't have a repertoire of material that will spike buying temperature, and fall into a trap of talking about situational stuff, which girls just interpret as you trying to get rapport with them, and makes you unchallenging.

5- There is a difference between a girl being attracted to you, and a girl wanting to fuck you. If you are TOO GIVING in set, then you run the risk of being the first guy, not the second. You have to be giving, but strategically.

6- To implant the idea of seducing you into the girls' mind, you have to have a repertoire of material to do so. That is BOTH material to entertain sets so you can pull a girl from her group or open a lone girl in a way that doesn't set off an autopilot response, but also you have to have material that gets her thinking that she wants you and gets her chasing you. This material is a combination of regular material that you use to spike buying temperature, and then pulling back, as well as recognizing anything that you can misinterpret as her trying to seduce you, and then pulling back from that as well, which raises the challenge and makes her do it more, and then you can play with it in the ways that were mentioned.


Anyway, hopefully some guys got some useful ideas from this post. I'm not sure how well it came across in writing, and I much prefer just demonstrating it in field, because although its complex in writing, its fairly simple in practice once you know what to look for and what to use.

Have fun.



-TD

[twatteaser]

Buying temperature is just a term to describe the 'levels' that a chick will be at as the dynamic between you and her changes and progresses. Below is the original post made at mASF, again by that TylerDurden guy.

Just a quick note though, don't overcomplicate matters with terminology, the reason that is in place is so people who wish to can discuss it between themselves. Once translated back to normal speak it's intuitive and obvious.

Example;
"I ran a cocky and funny routine to demonstrate higher value, she giggled and hit me so I took this as an indicator of her buying temperature escalating"

Translation;
"I told a joke and she laughed. She's into me"


*************************

Date Posted: 2003/08/07 07:04:00 AM EDT
Author: TylerDurden <unknown email address>
Subject: late night spastic ramblings part two

Hey guys.. I've been busy as hell, and no time to post. I'm having an awesome summer.

It's late, and I'm feeling kind of manic (therefore in the mood to write and write).

I don't have time to post actively anymore, but here's a pile stuff I've been up to lately. I hope you guys enjoy it. It should shine some light on my style. I'm not criticizing other people's styles, who you can learn from also, since they obviously get the results at the end of the day. This is MY understanding of game.


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At this point in my game, my focus is on pushing girls into BUYING TEMPERATURE, recognizing it, and ESCALATING.

In field, I have the terms:
-lockup
-unlocked
-buying temperature levels
-escalation


LOCKUP:

Chick is unresponsive. Ask questions, she says "I don't know" or "no", or any blowoff answer. She holds tense shoulders, and if you say "high-5" or try to physically displace her in any way whatsoever, she says the words "I'm scared / you're scaring me / etc". This does NOT mean she is physically afraid. This is like a chick saying "not yet" when you go to kiss her too early in the night. She's JUST saying "I'm not at buying temperature yet". A chick who is
locked up cannot even move or give a proper answer for a million dollars. She is locked up. Causes of lockup can be that she sees her friend hitting buying temperature for you too quickly, and she doesn't like it, or that you have conveyed too much eagerness too early.


UNLOCKED:

She is now OPEN to being gamed. Girls KNOW what you're doing when you run material. They may not know its pre-canned, but they know what it means when you tease them - its SEXUAL COMMUNICATION and they know what's up. If a chick is locked up, she isn't even OPEN to this sort of communication. Once unlocked, you can now begin gaming.

Chicks become UNLOCKED when you don't telegraph interest (check the 25 points checklist), and therefore trust your intentions. Also, when you CONVEY PERSONALITY, and they therefore can FILL IN the canvas of your life, they increase trust.

SIGNS of chick being unlocked - KINO TESTS. Hold out your palms upwards. If she puts her hands there, squeeze them. If she squeezes back, she's unlocked for sure. Likewise, tap her, if she taps back playfully, she's unlocked and sexually engaged probably.


BUYING TEMPERATURE LEVELS:

-enough for her to sit there while you game her
-enough to show an IOI like a giggle
-enough to show an IOI and kino you
-enough to show alot of IOIs and ask you questions
-enough for you to venue change her
-enough for you to kino HER, and give her IOIs, and she still likes it (usually
after qualification phase, because she now feels she EARNED your attention,
rather than you just want to fuck her like every other guy on the planet)
-enough for you to get physical with her
-enough for you to fuck her


As EACH Buying Temperature increase, the chick will usually SHIT TEST you, as a way of TRYING to throw herself OUT OF STATE. She shit tests by doing things that if you react too seriously, she'll get upset and therefore be thrown out of state. By passing shit tests, Buying Temperature is AMPLIFIED. This is like when Eddy (whitedragonPUA) posted about his HBRugby Lay report. She kept
punching him all night. After he laid her, he asked her why. She said "I just thought you'd go away"... She knew she was hitting buying temperature, and didn't want to succumb to it so she shit tested by hitting him and hoped that he would back off and she would come down. Think back to when you tried to kiss a girl on a date, and she said "NOT YET". She doesn't mean NO. She ONLY
means "I'm not at buying temperature yet.. Give me more gaming". Likewise, you try to venue change a girl, and she says "No. But I still want to talk to you". You keep gaming her, and a few minutes later you change venues. This was because you tried to ESCALATE PRIOR TO ATTAINING THE RIGHT LEVEL OF BUYING TEMPERATURE.

There are many examples of chicks trying to throw themselves out of state when hitting buying temperature, but then by passing shit tests it is actually amplified: Chick feels herself getting horny. HB: "You're a player". PUA: "Yeah.. so what is it that turns you on so much about players anyway"
(Response works firstly because you didn't disagree, so she can't get mad for you lying to her and break her own state, and secondly because you say something COCKY, which hits her emotionally, and therefore raises buying temperature)

EG: Chick says "we shouldn't be doing this"... PUA responds "yeah, we shouldn't be doing this" but KEEPS going.

In both cases, the chick feels her buying temperature increasing unusually rapidly (because of the PUA skillset), and tries to stop what's happening.

When Buying Temperature is hit too quickly, it is called FRYING OUT HER CIRCUITS. This is like when chicks giggle uncontrollably and run away from you even though they like you, or when a chick is at a rock concert and starts screaming and crying when the rockstar comes out. She has hit buying temperature so fast, her circuits fry out and she freaks.

"Routine Outcome Dependence" is a phenomena where you're too HOOKED on seeing chicks increasing buying temperature. EG: "Calling a chick a powerpuff girl will make her giggle"... So when a chick isn't giggling, you try to FORCE it by calling her a Powerpuff girl. EXCEPT, she KNOWS that not normal to say that to a chick whose all serious, so knows something is up (this is actually the 26th
'trying too hard to qualify' thing I guess - routine outcome dependence). The SAME goes for when she's all serious, and you try TOO HARD to seem happy and fun. She KNOWS that you're doing it to get with her, and it doesn't make sense. That does NOT mean state match. It just means MODERATE and don't appear PHONEY. Most Buying Temperature tools are to be used to AMP a state
that you see building. She starts giggling a BIT, and you call her a powerpuff girl, and now she giggles a LOT. If she's not giggling AT ALL, then maybe it was the wrong time. She DETECTS that you were consciously TRYING to increase her buying temperature, and blows you off. Field experience is KING, nobody is above it. Field experience helps us to develop an INTUITION of WHERE and WHEN
to use the particular material.


TO INCREASE BUYING TEMPERATURE:

(First, remember that there are PRECONDITIONS to a girl even being OPEN to you start to affect her this way. For a set of HB10s, they often may not even ALLOW themselves to be affected by your game, unless you have social proof or status somehow.. Likewise, even for a lesser HB7, if you are smelly and fat and gross, she won't be open to it, even if what you're doing is proper tight game)

--Pump them through emotions rapidly.. (I personally use a detailed system of building routines that increase buying temperature.. basically, routines hit emotions through languaging or demonstration.. not hard.. this way I can build routines on the fly and not rely on canned material - infinite routines via proper understanding or structure and basic creativity) ---

THINK MAKEUP SEX: How good is makeup sex compared to normal sex? WHY? Because you've been pumped through so many emotions. This is what NORMAL sex is like for chicks - hence they like badboys, they like skydiving and sex in exciting places, they like makeup sex, etc etc..

Think Swingdancing routine, think Rollerblading routine, think puppydog
routines, think jerk routines, think magic, think funny kino shit like hitting them and spinning them, think cocky stuff. It runs them through various emotions FAST. Story telling must be run in a way that is melodic, and talks fast enough to keep them captivated, but also runs them through emotions at the right progression without talking fast like you're trying too hard.

[twatteaser]

I'll try an add more as I find stuff myself. Any questions feel free to post or PM me if you will. Thanks in Advance. TT